The classic dilemma

I realized I was facing a classic dilemma today …

Should I strive to do great things? Think of things like founding a company that will have an IPO in 5-years, creating a solution for world poverty/world peace/global warming, doing everything to become as attractive as possible for the opposite sex (work out, learn to dance well and how to make intelligent jokes, get a penis enlargement, break my nose and pray that it will grow straight this time, learn how to look really confident, etc),

OR …

Should I be against striving? Do I need to go inwards and question my restless feeling, that lack, fear and unsatisfied“thing“before I identify myself with it and go chase what ever it says is missing? Because if I don’t feel any lack, if I don’t need to compare myself anymore with an ideal and finally see and feel that what is `good, admirable and worth suffering for“ is a big pile of subjective bullshit, what’s the use of running around like crazy? Besides, most problems are created by a (untrue) feeling that something is missing and that something else should be…examples: must have a big car, must show that I’m a man and therefore physically challenge someone, I want to have money and so I rob a old lady, etc. So what did I do? I set-up a groupspace page of course.

Ask yourself: What is real? What is worth living by?

Is there good and bad from religious point of view? I don’t think so. If I decide to rape someone (just to name something pretty dramatic that’s not on my goals list) and therefore should go to hell, then I could say I really didn’t have a choice. I was made that way by god and as I’m his son I and my actions are obviously divine. If I have been created with free choice in mind and I choose the so called bad, than the choice itself and its consequences are also divine, as God gave me that choice. If one of the two options (to be an Angel or a Hell’s Angel) were unacceptable, from her almighty point of view, then she wouldn’t have given me this freedom.

Most people mess up by most standards. That’s the thing about standards; there will always be only a few holy men, a few football stars and a few venture capitalists teaching part-time at MIT. Only a few deserve an A plus. If all the remaining“losers“weren’t tolerable, god would have designed a system that allows a higher success rate. The mass at the base of the pyramid (created by any theory in which you divide a group by a certain measure) allows others to stick out in the chosen way. That is called oneness; you don’t have one without the other.

Is there a good and a bad from a scientific point of view? Never ever will it be scientifically provable that there exists a good or a bad. You can only talk about effective or non-effective when having a certain goal in mind. That’s what scientific theory is all about. You can prove that people usually get furious when their stoned teenage son decides to go joyriding in their new Porsche and crashes it into a wall, but you can’t proof that he was wrong. It is a moral, subjective question. Good and bad is goal oriented thinking, it’s impossible without the brain that is more similar to a computer than we want to believe (it also operates with 0´s and 1´s a.k.a. good and bad). Good versus bad is based on the specific interests at hand.

Are we allowed to intoxicate the world? Yes we are, there’s the possibility, we take it and pretend to have a fun time doing it while chasing equally important goals such as money and pussy. Do you think you should save the beautiful nature and humankind? I like to believe so too, but proof beyond arguments in favor of self preservation is hard to find. If you believe to have it I would love to hear it.

Aside from my opinion that the evolution theory is incomplete, assuming its truthfulness offers me a very hopeful philosophy that I hope I’ll one day fully feel, breath and act upon (just for the sake of breaking free of repressive inner rules). We are lucky to actually be alive; we are the cause of random survival of species and could just as well never have been. We are here by luck; all that we have and are is for free and at your disposal to enjoy, cherish or destroy. You don’t need to do anything, there’s no bar you have to fulfill, no test to pass, no goals to make. So then you ask yourself, what to do if you don’t need to do anything anymore by any standard. You can let go of all the rules, the measuring, all the musts and all the have to´s. And what remains is existence, one ness, everything in equal value, no right, no wrong, just orgasms. This state is impossible to imagine for the brain as it always values the worth of things and thereby ironically takes away all the real value of everything. I experienced a state of non judgment very strongly (even if just for a few seconds) twice in my life. Twice it was while looking a stranger and spontaneously but consciously not starting with the automatic evaluation of the type of person she was. There was no analysis, no descriptions of who she might be. It was total bliss, I didn’t know if I was going to cry or laugh, faint or be super conscious, scream or be totally silent. It was orgasmic and I have decided to strive for it …

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